monkeeys

monkeeys

Friday, December 1, 2017

A camel is a horse designed by a committee and JJOKE regulations are laws designed by jackasses

Anyone that watched the latest JJOKE meeting was treated to the glaring reality that JJOKE commissioners have no clue what the Lobby Act they are supposed to be enforcing actually says.

And no I'm not talking about the most recent flip flop where they publicly emasculated their executive director and said that the proposed lobby regulations now do have the force and effect of law even though Agata was very clear last time that they were merely guidance.  The fact that Mike Rozen was so clear that the proposed regs are actually regulations is a good thing.  There can be no doubt now about the issue for my Article 78.  I say JJOKE doesn't have the authority to issue lobby regulations JJOKE says they do, we will let a court decide.

No I'm talking about how foolish the JJOKE commissioners that commented on the proposed regulations sounded.  They proved the adage that it is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than speak and remove all doubt.

Case in point Commissioner McAuliffe.  I had heard from some friends that knew him from out west that he is a blowhard that loves to hear himself speak.  His performance at the meeting validated the assessment.  Here are a couple of his better moments:

At approximately the 30 minute mark during a conversation about coalitions (we will discuss coalitions shortly) McAuliffe chimes in with this beauty "this will include unincorporated 501c3 organizations correct?"   WTF?????    There is no such thing as an unincorporated 501c3 organization.   Does McAuliffe know what a 501c3 is? does he know what the term unincorporated means.  How is it even possible for the two terms to be combined?  It's like saying a pregnant gelding.  Gelding . . . get it like Agata after Rozen issued his statement on regulations.

McAuliffe had preceded that beauty with his discussion of applications by commissioned sales people for exemptions from being lobbyists.   Does he understand anything about procurement lobbying?  Does he know why commissioned salespeople are exempt?  Why there is no process to apply for an exemption?  Clearly not, he just wanted to hear himself bloviate.  And he topped it by referencing the "quarterly reporting obligations"   Quarterly?   Who reports quarterly?   Lobbyists report on a bimonthly basis.  Bimonthly you know every other month.   And nobody, not the staff nor the other commissioners correct him.

Then McAuliffe asks if reportable business relationships covered under 943.14 are effected by 943.4a2 that exempts lawyers providing legal services from the definition of lobbyist but requires registration after they are retained to lobby.  Staff look at each other in utter confusion as the two sections have nothing to do with one another but no one says what the fuck are you talking about.   Clueless clowns

Lastly a lively argument breaks out about who has to be included in coalitions for expense reporting purposes but no one seems to realize that coalitions can not report expenses as they do not exist and have no legal standing   They can not have bank accounts, they can't deposit funds or expend them.  They are merely aliases for groups each spending their own funds.   Chew on this one guys and gals   If I register a coalition how can that coalition report source of funding when they can not legally receive donations and or contributions?   All you are doing with regulations allowing coalitions to register is promoting a mechanism to hide lobbying expenditures.   And before you bring up the old lobby commission opinion allowing coalitions to register I wrote that opinion so I actually understand it.  And I know it was written before source of funding disclosure was required.   I would never have written that same opinion today.  I'd follow New York City's lead and only allow actual legal entities to register as lobbyists or be reported as clients.   But thanks for creating even more ways for my clients to follow your rules and shelter disclosure    DOPES

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

How will Agata get out of this mess?

The mess I'm referring to is the year long waste of time and resources otherwise known as the proposed comprehensive lobby regulations aka the we never bothered to check to see if we had the authority to issue lobby regulations so lets call them guidance now that Grandeau made us look foolish again.

Various JJOKE commissioners who have extensive experience with the legislature and regulations have been asking some difficult questions since Monday.  Questions like which staff member (Martin or Monica) will take the blame for this glaring legal mistake?  Or what can we do to salvage this PR disaster?  Or when will Agata get back from vacation and fall on his sword and resign?  Some are even trying to follow the Agata company spin and are telling people and the media it's all just a big communications mistake these were never meant as real regulations only "guidance regulations". 

Will the commissioners with reputations in government service go along with Agata's big lie?  Yates, Weismann, Levine and Dearing know you need legislative authority as an agency to issue formal regulations.  How foolish are they willing to look saying these were never really regulations?  Just take a look at all the material JJOKE has published calling them regulations . . . for Gods sake you published them in the state register under title 19 as



"Title 19 NYCRR Part 943 is added to read as follows:


OFFICIAL COMPILATION OF CODES, RULES AND REGULATIONS OF THE STATE OF NEW YORK

TITLE 19. DEPARTMENT OF STATE

CHAPTER XX. JOINT COMMISSION ON PUBLIC ETHICS
PART 943: LOBBYING"


And yes I've printed all the proof to use in my Article 78 proceeding.

Here is a suggestion that JJOKE staff can do the exact opposite of since we all know if I say black they will say white.

Next meeting put out amended regulations oops guidance for further comment.  Title the document "guidance" and hope everyone forgets you spent a year doing regulations you were never authorized to issue.  Pass the source of funding regulations and when asked act like those were the only regulations you were working on.  Hold a vote on the guidance next year and I will not have standing to bring an Article 78.

Given enough time you can use the strategy of calling them best in the nation guidance.

Except those of us that know about these things will always know Agata stepped on his dick but so did all the experts that submitted comments that failed to note the lack of authority to issue lobby regulations.

Is it any wonder why I keep adding clients?   JJOKE making Grandeau richer every time they screw up.

 
 

Friday, November 3, 2017

How many JJOKE lawyers does it take to screw up regulations?

ALL OF THEM

Read todays story by Chriss Bragg in the Times Union http://www.timesunion.com/news/article/Long-discussed-lobbying-rules-now-only-advisory-12327130.php

JJOKE has been touting all the work they have put in on these "regulations" for well over a year and they just now decide that they really aren't enforceable regulations they are just guidance regulations.  TOO FUNNY what exactly is a guidance regulation?

It's the best Seth Agata could come up with after I again alerted them that JCOPE did not have statutory authority to issue regulations.

How is it possible with all those genius lawyers at JJOKE that none of them bothered to check if they had statutory authority to issue lobby regulations?

INCOMPETANCE  plain and simple.  Think about all the lawyers that now look like incompetent fools:

Seth Agata
Martin Levine
Monica Stamm
another dozen or so JCOPE staff lawyers whose names I don't remember but I'm sure all wrote chapters for Agata's book Lobbying Compliance for Dummies or was that Lobbying Compliance by Dummies?

Well over a million dollars a year in staff salaries wasted on proposed comprehensive lobby regulations that they now can't issue as regulations but will have to call guidance.

And JJOKE was not alone think of all the lawyers and groups that submitted comments and never bothered to verify that JJOKE had the authority to issue these lobby regulations.  Lobby compliance firms and good government groups alike missed this basic legal point - should they really be the ones anyone relies on for compliance advice?

But they are welcome to join me in the Article 78 if Agata and JJOKE insist on issuing regulations.

And right now Agata and the JJOKE commissioners are pulling their hair out they know I am legally correct that they lack authority to issue lobby regulations but they would rather slam their collective dicks in a car door than publicly admit that.  They need to buy time, delay postpone and hope they can convince the legislature to pass yet another best in the nation lobby reform that grants them the authority to issue these regulations.

Now if I was a lobbyist, and I'm not or if I was a PR firm I would do all I could to insure that doesn't happen.  wait a minute did I just engage in grassroots lobbying under the new regulations?  Do I have to register?  Or because they are not enforceable regulations but merely guidance am I in the clear.

Lets make it easy for JJOKE   I make way more that $5000 for advocating against your regulations, I'm not registered as a lobbyist please please please bring an enforcement action against me for failure to register as a lobbyist and lets let a court decide.

And one last thing what did Agata do after creating this cluster fuck?


To: "Grandeau@ix.netcom.com"

Subject: Automatic reply: JJOKE regulations .... excuse me "guidance"

Date: Nov 3, 2017 10:08 AM

I will be out of the office beginning Thrusday, November 2d and returning to work on Monday, November 13th. 

Even Nero hung around while Rome burned.

Monday, March 20, 2017

Dick Dadey ridden hard and put away wet

I can't believe I actually agree with Rich Assonfire or Azzopardi.

Dick Dadey and his fragile ego are hypocrites.  Truer words were never spoken.

That Dadey is upset that the governor's people have not spoken to him about ethics reform is priceless.

Dick they've been giving you, Blair and the rest of the goo goos a mercy reach around for years and now you are upset that you have to jerk yourself off?  Too funny.   Look at the bright side at least this year when it comes to the goo goos and ethics reform the pleasure given will equal the pleasure received.

It's not like you were ever relevant when it came to changing ethics in NY government

I've ridiculed Dick for years  here are some of my favorites:

http://davidgrandeau.blogspot.com/search?q=Dadey

But I don't remember seeing Dick at JJOKE meetings.  Too busy covering for the Gov in the old days when Steve Cohen was on his board.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

JJOKE back in the slow lane

March 2, 2017 -  3993 registrations had been filed for 2017 and 3587 were still being processed which means 406 had been approved.  406 in over 2 months.  That's about 10 a day.

 March 3, 2017 - 3999 registrations had been filed and 3575 were still being processed which means 424 had been approved.  That's 18 registrations approved March 3, 2017.

 March 6 - 4013 registrations had been filed and 3549 were still being processed which means 464 had been approved.  That's 40 registrations approved March 6.

 March 7, 2017 -  4017 registrations had been filed and 3532 were still being processed which means 485 had been approved.  That's 21 registrations approved March 7.

March 8, 2017 - 4021 registrations had been filed and  3512 were still being processed which means  509 had been approved.  That's  24 registrations approved March 8.

 March 9, 2017 - 4030 registrations had been filed and  3476 were still being processed which means  554 had been approved.  That's  45 registrations approved March 9.

 March 10, 2017 - 4041 registrations had been filed and  3458 were still being processed which means  583 had been approved.  That's  29 registrations approved March 10.

 March 13, 2017 - 4051 registrations had been filed and  3429 were still being processed which means  622 had been approved.  That's  39 registrations approved March 13.

March 14, 2017 - 4053 registrations had been filed and  3431 were still being processed which means  622 had been approved.  That's  0 registrations approved March 14.

Today 4075 registrations had been filed and  3431 were still being processed which means  644 had been approved.  That's 22 registrations approved March 15.

22 registrations approved and 22 new registrations filed that's called being stuck in the mud.  At this rate JJOKE will never be finished  that's Agata's idea of job security.

How long can they continue at a snails pace before someone notices that Agata couldn't manage an ice cream stand in the Sahara.  Agata couldn't manage a whorehouse in Spitzers neighborhood.

In a word Agata should be ashamed to take a paycheck.

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Who is essential at JJOKE?

March 2, 2017 -  3993 registrations had been filed for 2017 and 3587 were still being processed which means 406 had been approved.  406 in over 2 months.  That's about 10 a day.

 March 3, 2017 - 3999 registrations had been filed and 3575 were still being processed which means 424 had been approved.  That's 18 registrations approved March 3, 2017.

 March 6 - 4013 registrations had been filed and 3549 were still being processed which means 464 had been approved.  That's 40 registrations approved March 6.

 March 7, 2017 -  4017 registrations had been filed and 3532 were still being processed which means 485 had been approved.  That's 21 registrations approved March 7.

March 8, 2017 - 4021 registrations had been filed and  3512 were still being processed which means  509 had been approved.  That's  24 registrations approved March 8.

 March 9, 2017 - 4030 registrations had been filed and  3476 were still being processed which means  554 had been approved.  That's  45 registrations approved March 9.

 March 10, 2017 - 4041 registrations had been filed and  3458 were still being processed which means  583 had been approved.  That's  29 registrations approved March 10.
March 13, 2017 - 4051 registrations had been filed and  3429 were still being processed which means  622 had been approved.  That's  39 registrations approved March 13.

Today only essential state workers are working.  I'm working so I called JJOKE to see who was in.

No Answer

Agata - not essential - NO SHIT
Levine - not essential - NO SHIT
Monica - not essential - NO SHIT
Pei Pei - not essential - NO SHIT
McClueless - not essential - NO SHIT
JJOKE lawyers - not essential - NO SHIT
JJOKE staff - not essential - NO SHIT
JJOKE - not essential - NO SHIT

Of course tomorrow is a filing deadline do you think JJOKE will extend the deadline as a result of their day off to stay home drink hot chocolate and congratulate themselves on how hard they work?

Me neither that's why I'm working today to get all my clients filings done on time.

I bet I do more filings today than JJOKE processes.

Hell that's no different than when all the not essential JJOKERS actual show up to work.

For the record Today - 4053 registrations had been filed and  3431 were still being processed which means  622 had been approved.  That's  0 registrations approved March 14.

Agata this is exactly the kind of work that can be done remotely.  Do you want me to knock out a couple hundred registrations for you today?

Just say the word and I'll use that access to the system I have and help you out so you don't have to interrupt your sleigh riding time.

And by the way the New York City Lobby Commission was processing registrations today    No backlog in the city.


Monday, March 13, 2017

Who cares that JJOKE doesn't approve registrations?

Anyone that files reports.

You see a backlog (that's too small a term) a logjam (not big enough) a bottleneck (no that's not enough either) a complete failure of the JJOKE registration system effects other disclosure reports as well.

You can't amend registrations until they are approved and yet the statute requires amendments to be made within 10 days of their occurrence.  Had a carryover contract that expired in January and you want to extend it?  Too bad you can't amend to extend until they get around to approving your registration.  Watch for the late fee they will impose.  Register without that comma or ampersand that Amy Nicotera is demanding? Too bad you can't amend until they get around to approving your registration.  Watch for the late fee they will impose.

How about bimonthly reports?  They are due by Wednesday.  You can file them without your registration being approved but they can't be approved until the registration is approved which results in another backlog (that's too small a term) a logjam (not big enough) a bottleneck (no that's not enough either) a complete failure of the JJOKE disclosure reporting system and you guessed it you can't amend to correct any typos or other errors in reporting.  End result a disclosure system that should be available in real time to the public isn't even reliably accurate at any time much less in real time.

Hey Agata it's 2017 even a nut less monkey could do a better job of managing JJOKE.

Gagan? Gagan?

Tagliafierro? Tagliafierro?

Biben?  Biben?

Bueller?  Bueller?